By Rebecca Littlehales

Act II

     Beth was confused when she woke up, because it was still dark out but her watch read 8:30 a.m. Assuming that her watch was wrong, she went into the front of the store and looked at the clock on the wall.
     "8:32! What's going on here?" she said to herself. It wasn't time for the store to open yet, but it was close enough-- she couldn't believe that she'd slept at the store all night, but apparantly she had. Looking out the window, she determined that it wasn't dark outside, but that there was something covering the glass. A closer examination discovered that it was some sort of vine. "Those plants that were outside last night! It has to be! Wow, they grew quick!" she said, pondering her situation. How could those plants have grown to completely cover the store like this? Those were questions for a later time, she decided. Her first priority would be getting out of the building.
     She crossed the store to the phone and dialed Henny's number. It rang twice before Henny picked up, sounding a little tense. "Hi, Henny? It's Beth... Are you on the other line?" she said apologetically.
     "No, Beth, it's okay. What do you want?" said Henny, whose voice now sounded tense and a little exasperated.
     "Um, well... This sounds kind of odd, but I'm stuck in the hardware store. It's the weirdest thing-- the whole building seems to be covered by some sort of plant. I don't suppose you could come over to help me out, could you?" she said.
     "Gee, Beth, I'd love to," said Henny, the hint of exasperation in her voice growing into full-fledged annoyance, "except that I can't quite seem to make it out of my house either! Haven't you seen the news, girl? This isn't an isolated incident, the whole city has been run over by these plants and nobody can get out and we're all trapped in here forever and we're going to die and I've never experienced true love with an incredibly rich young man!" Henny's voice rose to a shout, and near the end of the incredible run-on sentence, she sounded like she could really use a smack. Her voice cut off forcefully as she regained control of herself.
     "Oh, my gosh! The whole city? What'll we do?" exclaimed Beth.
     "I don't know!" snapped Henny. "No one knows! And you call yourself a genius... Say, what are you doing at the hardware store anyway? Did you, like, sleep there or something?"
     "Um... Of course not," said Beth. Unable to think of a proper excuse, she then said, "Actually, yes. But anyway, I'm really sorry to be so dense, Henny, I'll try to figure out a way to get out of here and then I'll call you back, well, see you!" she said in one breath, trying to get off of the phone before Henny started making fun of her for taking her job too seriously.
     "I'll have to find another way out of here," she thought to herself. Her eye fell upon some heavy-duty pruning tools in the corner.
     Meanwhile, at Drake's, Gosalyn was attempting to wake her father out of a sound sleep-- no easy task. She shook him frantically.
     "Dad! DAD! Wake up! The city's been overrun by plants!"
     "...What time is it, Gosalyn?" said Drake groggily. "For your sake, it had better be at least 11:00."
     "It's nine o'clock, Dad--"
     "In the evening?"
     "In the morning!"
     "And what's happening outside?"
     "The city has been totally shut off from the outside world! No one can get out of their houses because--" began Gosalyn urgently until Drake calmly cut her off.
     "Is anyone getting hurt?"
     "...No..."
     "Any crime sprees?"
     "No one can get outside!" she said.
     "Then wake me up again in another hour, or if the situation gets any more urgent," he said, and rolled over to go back to sleep.

     The center square of St. Canard was deserted, no surprise considering that no one could get there. Bushroot couldn't think of a day like this since... Ever, come to think of it.
     "Ah, what a lovely day! And such a lovely bunch to share it with!" he said happily, regarding his audience: shrubs, flowers, the occasional bonsai tree. They used their leaves to applaud him as he took his place on top of a soap box. "Thank you, thank you.
     "Now, I suppose you're wondering why I called you all here." The plants all listened intently, incapable of speech anyway. "Well, my fawning flora, I believe it's time for a change of government here in St. Canard! If we want the respect we deserve, it's up to us to take it! All opposed, say 'nay'!" There was no response.
     "As for a new leader, well, I nominate myself! All those opposed?" Again, there was no reply. "It's unanimous then! I'm governor-- no, President-- No, King of St. Canard! LONG LIVE THE KING!!" proclaimed Bushroot triumphantly. He began to laugh, chuckling a bit to himself at first and then building to the "insane genius" variety. Stopping suddenly, he said, "You know, I'm really not evil-- just misunderstood."

     The pruning shears had been Beth's last hope, but just after she'd opened the door (thank heavens it opened inwards) and started towards the plants covering the exit, vines wrapped around the handle of the shears and pulled them out of her hands. "Rats," she said, slouching to the ground. Suddenly an odd thought hit her: Did these plants think for themselves? Beth loved plants, and was a firm believer that they understood human speech and even, possibly, had human feelings. But the action that they'd taken just now, of pulling the shears out of her hands before she'd even used them, suggested that they were truly sentient, and even able to see what was in front of them. If that were true, then any number of things was possible about plant life! Beth was amazed, lost in thought for a moment. Maybe the plants of St. Canard felt unappreciated in their life, and that was why they were taking over the city. It made sense. If a lot of people were like Henny, then plants that sprung up just anywhere probably recieved some terrible treatment. Beth had always tried to treat her plants with care, but now she felt sorry for those plants who were neglected. After all, if her theory was correct, they were much the same as pets- just a little less mobile. Or not, she realized as her mind returned to where she was at the time. She had to get out of the building, now more than ever. She had to show the plants that someone cared about them. A last desperate idea occured to her, and she turned and faced the doorway.
     "Um... Hi," she said, not sure of what to say. "Great, I really deserve some sort of award for that one. Congratulations, Beth, you've reached a new level of pitifulness! You are now too shy to talk to plants! Hooray!" Of course, she thought, these plants hold my freedom, and quite possibly my life, in their hands (as it were). So watch your tongue, Bethie. She cleared her throat and started again. "Sorry about that. I have a sort of a, problem communicating with people. Listen, my name's Beth. I don't know if you remember me from last night, when I saw you outside? I'm sorry I called you weeds. I didn't mean any offense by it." They rustled softly, apparently hearing her. "Actually, you're quite lovely. I mean it! Your leaves are very delicate..." She reached out and touched one of the leaves on the plants. It recoiled from her but made no move against her. "Sorry. Hey, sorry about the shears, too, while I'm at it. No offense meant. I wanted out, and I was starting to panic. I've got my head now. I've got a plant of my own at home, her name is Sheila... Maybe you know her?" She kept talking, totally casually, for several minutes. The plants listened, and seemed to lose their hostile edge. At one point, one of the vines wrapped itself gently around her wrist. She was startled at first, but remained calm on the outside. Eventually she realized that it was just being friendly and she was flattered.
     "So... now that we're friends and all, how about letting me outside? I can honestly promise you that I won't do anything to you," she said. The plants obligingly swept away from the door. "Thank you, you're the most wonderful sweeties in the world," she said to the plants as she walked outside. "I have a green thumb," she said, smiling, as she walked down the street surrounded by adoring plants.
     From far away, Bushroot was watching the only human on the streets, filled with curiosity. "Who is she?" he asked the plants that surrounded him. "How'd she get outside? I must know! Bring her to me!" he ordered, spreading the word to all the plants in the city.
     "So, I dunno, I figure if I can make it to Drake's everything should be pretty good, y'know? And I am using just about the worst grammer I have ever even thought of...what is wrong with me lately?" said Beth, partly to the plants and partly to herself. "But you know, even when I do get to Drake's I still don't know how I'll get inside..."
     Spotting a payphone, it occured to her that it might be a nice idea to call the Mallard residence first-- just to be polite. She put in a quarter, and the plants dialed the phone and held the reciever for her. "Oh, thank you... You're so sweet!" she said to the plants, charming their buds off and consequently wondering why she was unable to do this with humans.
     "Y'see, if I can just reach Drake, he has connections to Darkwing Duck and he can probably-- hello?" she said, breaking off mid- sentence as Gosalyn answered.
     "Y-ello, it's your quarter!" said Gosalyn on the other end of the line.
     "Yes, hello, this is Beth--" This time, the sentence was broken off for her as the plants that surrounded her suddenly wrenched the phone from her hands. "What the--?" she said as they looped around her legs and soon her entire lower torso, and then lifted her upside down into the air. "Did... I say something wrong?" she asked timidly, hanging on to her glasses as she was carried down the street.
     Meanwhile, Gosalyn had heard Beth give her name, although just barely. "Hello? Beth? Beth, are you there?" she repeated this several times into the phone and when there was still no answer, she knew that something was wrong. "Dad! Dad!!! It's an emergency! WAKE UP, DARKWING!!!"

     Beth was taken to a greenhouse. She wasn't exactly surprised, considering who her captors were, but she was shocked to find evidence of someone else that apparantly took use of the facilities of the building: There were several pieces of easy furniture, mostly tables covered with lab equipment. She looked around in wonder, not daring to speak.
     There were plants everywhere, but not a one moved as she walked through the room. Here and there among the plants were inventions and formulas. She was curious about their nature, and was tempted to examine them to figure out their purpose and design, but the lack of motion in her surroundings held her back. All was silent, and Beth found herself forgetting to breathe.
     She spoke all of a sudden, and her voice sounded strange and flat in the complete silence. "Who could possibly stay here? There's no food... It couldn't be a human. It looks like some kind of plant, but there's no way that a plant could live on its own... what is it, vegetation or person?" she wondered aloud to the plants.
     "Neither," said a voice from behind her. "And both."
     She gasped, turning around quickly to find nothing behind her. Far away, a figure stood drenched in shadows. "What are you? Come into the light where I can see you," she said.
     Slowly, a figure stepped out towards her, watching her reaction guardedly. It was dressed oddly, in an ivy toga and a laurel wreath, and it watched her calmly. She gasped again, in shock but not in horror. "You-- you're a--"
The figure cut her off, speaking in measured tones. "I'm a Plant God. Rest assured, I won't hurt you. You seemed to have a way with plants, and I was curious as to how you got outside."
     "A Plant God?" she said in awe, completely fooled by him. And yet, there was something vaguely familiar about him that she just couldn't place. "So, you're the one that put the vines all over the houses? Why?"
     "It was for the good of mankind in the long run. There are things going on here that you cannot understand... and yet, since you were able to escape from the holding vegetation, perhaps you are... the Chosen One. I will send you on a quest...," he said, getting into the role he was playing. Meanwhile, she regarded him intently and finally figured out why he seemed familiar.
     "Wait a minute, I know you! You're no Plant God, you're Bushroot, the mutant plant-duck! And you're a villain!"
     "Drat," he said, snapping the leaves he used as fingers.
     "So-- so, you locked people in their houses with evil intent, kidnapped me, and then told me you were some sort of GOD? You don't normally dress like that, do you? And what was all that about a quest?!" she said incredulously. She couldn't remember a time when she had been so angry and had spoken so harshly.
     "Haven't you ever wanted to be one of those elders that sends people on quests? That just seemed like a fun thing to do," said Bushroot calmly, turning his back to her to tend to some of his potted plants in the corner.
     "Well, I guess I can sort of see where you're coming from... yeah, it does seem like fun. I always sort of wanted to be one of those heroes, too, and get a magic sword with a really long name, like Mjarnilhamm or something! But that still doesn't excuse the fact that you kidnapped me! Let me go! You can't keep me here for long!" she continued, color coming to her cheeks.
     "Oh, can't I?" he said smoothly. "Come on, sweetie, tell me how you got out of your house?" he asked again, trying to be kind of charming.
     "I didn't do much of anything... The plants just let me out," she said.
     "Really?! Why'd they do a thing like that?" he said, surprised.
     "Well... I assume because they like me! See, I was kind of nice to them and I kind of thought that maybe because of that they...."
     "Oh, yeah, I believe that they like you. I was just wondering, see, because I thought I was the only one who could talk to plants. And it's not even an inborn talent of mine... I just acquired it recently," he said, somewhat apologetically. She seemed interested, and he decided to tell her more later... if she was still around. He hoped she was. She was cute, too. "So, you... like plants?"
     "Oh, yeah, I really like them a lot! I'd keep a lot at my house except that it's really small and I don't spend a lot of time there, so I'm afraid that they'd all die. I have one and her name is Sheila... She's a Tropical Blue Blossom. Gorgeous foliage," she said happily, glad to have something in common with him but not knowing why she was glad.
     "That's neat. I'd like to meet her some time. So, I was wondering... will you be my friend?" There, he'd said it bluntly. He didn't have time to beat around the bush nowadays.
     She looked surprised first, and then flattered, and then somewhat disappointed. "Ummm, well, you seem like a really interesting guy and all, but I just don't think I can, seeing as how you're a villain and all," she said quietly, looking at her feet and thinking distractedly how overly large they were.
     "A villain, eh? Well, then, I'll just show you how much of a villain I can be! You won't be my friend-- fine then! You're just like everyone else in this misbegotten city! But in about five minutes, you'll have more in common with the citizens in the graveyard! Say your prayers!" he said, his eyes ablaze as he advanced on her.

     "Where are you going to start looking, Dad?" said Gosalyn as Darkwing prepared to leave the house in search of Beth.
     "I don't know, Gos-- it's tough enough to track her down when the city isn't being overpowered by plants. You couldn't have let me get in another half hour?" he said, stifling a yawn.
     "DW! Beth needs us! I thought you were a hero!" said Launchpad.
     "Hey, that's a low blow, LP. I am a hero, and you know it. I'm just tired."
     "It doesn't have anything to do with what you keep sayin' about not likin' her?" asked Launchpad, remembering a conversation that they'd had the night before- one that he hadn't liked too much.
     "Of course not!" Darkwing seemed offended for a second, and then, speaking barely above a mumble, he added, "Well, that has hardly anything to do with it."
     "You didn't even give her a chance! She's great once you get to know her... She's a great conversationalist and she's really smart, too!" said Launchpad, getting a distant look in his eye as he went on about Beth.
     "So, do you want to find her or just dream about her? LP, you have the weirdest taste in women...," said Darkwing as he settled on the chair. He rammed the head of the statue to trigger the switch and they were off. A very short while later they were at the tower, which was clear of vines.
     "Ha! I thought so. The plants haven't grown up this high!" said Darkwing triumphantly. Behind him, even as he spoke, the plants began to creep up through the windows and grow towards the pair silently.
     "You know what Beth said the other day? It was so funny," began Launchpad, trying to start a conversation as they started for the Ratcatcher.
     "Why don't you marry this woman if you love her so much?" snapped Darkwing, turning towards his sidekick. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted the plants growing towards them and shouted, "Look out, LP!" They broke into a run as Darkwing searched through his cape for the proper weapon. His hands closed around his gas gun just as Launchpad fell down, tripped by vines entangled around his feet.
     Whipping out the gun, he stopped and whirled around. "Suck weed killer, shrubs," he said, pulling the trigger.

     Beth, as usual, was completely intimidated by the fact that Bushroot had every intention of killing her. But rather than apologize, the way she usually did, for some reason she spoke up to defend herself.
     "Oh, fine then. Kill me. You don't know anything about being friends with anyone!" she accused him. Realizing she'd just made things worse, she bit her tongue and wished she could call the words back.
     Bushroot paused. "What do you mean, I don't know how to be friends? How would you know anything about me?!" He seemed hurt.
     Beth was torn, wanting to apologize and make things better. But the words that came out of her mouth weren't exactly the best for accomplishing that. "I know that you're a fool!" she yelled. 'Where is this coming from?' she wondered to herself, but continued yelling on the outside. "I mean, you can't force a person to be friends with you! That's like making them eat when they feel nauseous... the only thing it can accomplish is to make them unhappy! You're so demented!"
     "I am not demented!" he said. "I'm just misunderstood!"
     "Oh, yeah? Prove it!" she said.
     "Gladly! Have a seat!"
     Looking around, she couldn't find anything resembling a chair, and suddenly didn't want to lower her guard and sit down anyway. "Uh, no thanks... I'll just stand."
     "Sit down," he repeated, and some vines came up behind her and forced her into a sitting position. "Once upon a time," he began, and then paused. "Wait-- even though it starts out 'once upon a time,' it's still the truth, okay?" She nodded. "Okay. Once upon a time, I was a fleshling like you. I had it all-- looks, brains, money, popularity... and Rhoda. Ah, lovely Rhoda...," he trailed off at the memory of Dr. Rhoda Denron, one of his coworkers during his days of humanity.
     Beth could tell from the look in his eye that he had been in love with Rhoda, and a bit of sympathy popped up for him right then.
     "I was a scientist, named Reginald Bushroot," he said. "By the way, what's your name?"
     "Beth- Beth Webfoot," she said, a bit wary about giving out that information.
     "Beth. Hmmm. Is that short for anything?"
     "Uh... Elizabeth," she told him.
     "Elizabeth... yes, that suits you. That's what I'll call you. Now, what was I saying? Oh, yeah," he went on. "Everyone looked up to me- I was just about the top scientist there! Anyway, one day I was conducting an experiment that was meant to use photosynthesis to, *ahem*, end world hunger among humans- you see, I had a beneficial experiment going on, but does anyone ever mention that? No! All they ever report is- oh yeah. In any case, I used myself as a test subject, but something in the experiment went horribly wrong! The reaction was delayed, so at first I didn't think that anything had happened-- until I started turning green." Beth gasped in spite of herself. Bushroot noticed and went on, satisfied.
     "When I went outside, people screamed at me and called me a freak! I was terribly distraught, until I discovered a strange side effect: I could control plants. I set off to have revenge on everyone that had hurt me- Dr. Gary, Dr. Larson, the Dean... Basically everyone I worked with. All I ever wanted was to get them back, and win Rhoda over--"
     "I thought you said you were already going out with Rhoda," interrupted Beth, not even mentioning the other inconsistencies that had already popped up in his story.
     "Uh, yeah... well, I-- see...," he stammered.
     "It's okay, I understand now," she said gently.
     "You do?" he asked, startled.
     "Yeah, you're just like me! All we wanted were friends. We're lonely, outcasts-- freaks, almost, just because we're sort of different. Oh, Bushroot, if I wasn't tied up right now I'd give you the biggest hug of your life."
     "Well, I guess I could let you go, for a little while, anyway ," he said rapidly, signaling to the plants. They fell off of her in an instant. True to her word, she went up to him and hugged him tightly.

Continue